Vietnam vs U.S. Vietnamese Weddings: What Makes Them So Different?

Weddings are among the most meaningful milestones in anyone’s life. They mark the beginning of a new journey, the blending of two families, and the celebration of love. But depending on where the wedding takes place—Vietnam or the United States—the entire experience can feel completely different. Even though both involve Vietnamese families and Vietnamese culture, the environment, lifestyle, economy, and local customs shape the wedding day in unique ways.

This article explores the key differences between Vietnamese weddings in Vietnam and Vietnamese-American weddings in the United States, focusing on traditions, invitations, cash gifts, and overall costs. Whether you are planning a wedding, have attended one in either country, or are simply curious about cultural differences, this detailed breakdown will give you a full picture.

1. Traditional Elements: Vietnam Keeps It Deep, America Simplifies It

Vietnam: Rich Traditions Spread Over Multiple Days

In Vietnam, wedding traditions are deeply rooted in family culture. A wedding is not just about the bride and groom; it is about both families coming together, honoring ancestors, and maintaining customs passed down through generations.

Typical traditions include:

D?m ngõ (first introduction between families)
L? h?i (engagement ceremony)
L? r??c dâu (bride procession)
L? gia tiên (ancestral altar ceremony)
Ti?c bên nhà gái (party at bride’s home)
Ti?c bên nhà trai (party at groom’s home)

In many rural areas or small towns, the wedding celebration may last two to three days, sometimes longer. Families prepare food together, relatives from nearby provinces travel over, and neighbors join in without needing a formal invitation. The process feels communal, warm, and filled with emotional connection.

United States: Simplified, Modern, and Focused on the Couple

Vietnamese weddings in the U.S. also maintain certain traditions, but they are often simplified due to time, budget, lifestyle, and venue constraints.

A typical Vietnamese-American wedding includes:

A small tea ceremony
A church wedding or civil ceremony
One reception dinner

Most families combine the tea ceremony and reception on the same day to make it easier for guests. Only immediate family participates in the tea ceremony, and extended relatives or friends join during the reception.

Ceremonies are warm and meaningful, but they do not carry the same level of multi-day tradition seen in Vietnam. Weddings in the U.S. also emphasize the couple’s personal preferences more than cultural obligations.

2. The Atmosphere: Vietnam Is Energetic, the U.S. Is Structured

Vietnam: Joy, Music, Laughter, and a Festival-like Experience

If you have ever attended a countryside wedding in provinces like Bình Ph??c, Long An, or B?n Tre, you know how lively it can be. Rented tents are set up on the street, neighbors come early to help, and the entire area looks like a festival.

The atmosphere includes:

Loud music, live bands, karaoke
Parties that last late into the night
Crowds of relatives, friends, and villagers
Lots of toasting, laughter, and celebration

Even weddings in Saigon have a vibrant feel, though more modern and elegant, with hotel ballrooms, LED screens, and grand entrances.

United States: Elegant, Organized, and Strict with Time

Vietnamese-American weddings tend to be more structured:

The reception lasts around 4–5 hours
Dinner is served course by course
Music and dancing are present but controlled
There is a start time and a firm end time
Guests usually sit quietly and enjoy the program

This structure comes from venue policies, safety regulations, and cultural norms in the U.S.

Compared to the energetic, spontaneous vibe of Vietnam, U.S. weddings feel more formal and refined—but less noisy and less festive.

3. Invitations: Vietnam Relies on Emotion, America Requires Confirmation

Vietnam: “We Invite You, Hope You Come”

In Vietnam, people usually send:

Paper invitations
Messenger or Facebook invitations
Phone calls

However, guests rarely confirm whether they will attend. This creates uncertainty for the hosts. A family inviting 100 guests often prepares for 120 because some people will not show up, while others may bring additional guests without notice.

This reflects the cultural mindset: “The more the merrier.”

United States: RSVP Is Crucial

In the U.S., RSVPs are mandatory. Invitations typically include:

A printed card with RSVP
A QR code
An email form
A website link

Guests must confirm:

Whether they are attending
How many people are coming
Food restrictions (vegan, gluten-free, etc.)

This strong RSVP culture helps families avoid overspending and allows wedding planners to prepare accurately.

4. The Cash Gift (“Phong Bì”): Different Amounts, Different Purposes

Vietnam: Affordable Cash Gifts, Weddings Rarely Lose Money

In Vietnam, it is common for guests to bring envelopes:

500,000 VND to 1,000,000 VND
Sometimes 2–5 million for close relatives
Usually around 20–40 USD per guest

Because wedding costs in Vietnam are relatively low, most couples break even—or even make a small profit. This “money back from guests” concept is a familiar tradition. Many young couples use this money to begin their life together.

United States: Higher Cash Gifts, but Weddings Still Lose Money

In the U.S., guests typically give:

$150–$200 per person
$300–$500 for close friends or relatives

Even though the cash gifts are larger, wedding costs in the U.S. are dramatically higher. Many couples lose thousands—even tens of thousands—after their wedding.

A typical Vietnamese-American wedding can cost anywhere from:

$20,000 to $60,000

Based on:

Venue rental
Catering
Taxes and service fees
Decoration
Photographer and videographer
DJ or live band
Wedding attire
Wedding planners

So even with generous cash gifts, Vietnamese-American weddings almost always operate at a financial loss.

5. Cost Breakdown: Vietnam Is 7–10 Times Cheaper

Vietnam: Beautiful Weddings for a Fraction of the Price

Typical cost:

1 table (10 guests): 5–6 million VND (~$200)
Countryside weddings: even cheaper, 2–4 million VND per table
Photo booth, decorations, and live music: affordable

Vietnam offers a visually stunning wedding at a low price. Ballrooms in Saigon look luxurious, comparable to weddings in large U.S. cities—yet the cost is only a small fraction.

United States: Extremely Expensive Weddings

Costs add up quickly:

1 table (10 guests): $1,500–$2,000
Venue rental: $5,000–$20,000
Decorations: $2,000–$10,000
Photography + video: $2,000–$6,000
DJ or band: $1,000–$4,000

Even a simple wedding in the U.S. is expensive, and Vietnamese-American families often feel pressured to follow both Vietnamese and Western customs—doubling the cost.

6. The Atmosphere of Love: Warmth vs. Organization

Vietnam: A Celebration of Community

Whether in Saigon or rural provinces, Vietnam offers a wedding full of:

Warmth
Human connection
Family bonding
Traditional rituals
Laughter
Music

A wedding in Vietnam feels like a life event shared with the entire community.

United States: A Celebration of the Couple

In the U.S., weddings feel more intimate and intentional. They highlight:

Personal vows
Emotional speeches
Love stories
Couple-focused moments

It is more private, emotional, and personal.

7. Which One Is Better?

There is no “better” or “worse.” Each reflects the culture and lifestyle of its environment.

Vietnam:
Warm, lively, traditional, affordable, full of family involvement.
United States:
Elegant, structured, modern, expensive, focused on the couple.

Many Vietnamese-Americans even choose to return to Vietnam to celebrate weddings because:

Cheaper
More fun
More relatives can attend
Beautiful decorations

But at the end of the day, the best wedding is simply the one where:

The couple is happy, and both families feel connected.

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